I love you but......
I love you but...... (06/16/2006 02:14 PM)
The other day one of my friends from MD and I were discussing the ever popular feeling of "being in love". How many relationships end because they "fall out of love" or no longer are "in love". It really made me wonder if there is such a thing as "being in love" all the time? My marriage was wonderful in the beginning, like I am sure most are. Then after about 2 years the feeling of "in love" just kind of settled into the feeling of being loved and returning that love. Add a baby into that mix and life began getting hectic. After 10 years he said "I'm not in love with you anymore" um... well to be honest I wasn't "in love" with him anymore but I loved him enough to stay married and make it work. I see these couples that have been married for 40, 50 years and I know as sure as you do that there is NO WAY that they have kept the "in love feeling" all those years. I am sure they had times when they didn't like each other much at all. But they had something that most marriages don't today. They have the COMMITMENT to COMMIT to each other. Through everything that happens, be it good or bad. They made that commitment and they stayed. Of course they had their problems what couple doesn't? The difference, it's too easy to walk away from a commitment today. Commitment doesn't mean anything anymore. Words need actions to back them up. But unfortunately that doesn't happen. There are too many people out there searching for something to make them happy and give them that "high" that being "in love" gives you. Maybe it's time that we start looking for simply being loved and cherished until death do us part instead of looking for that high of emotions that crashes as soon as something goes wrong. I am not saying that there isn't such a thing as "being in love" but I do think that there is too much emphasis placed on "that" feeling. How about placing that enphasis on committing to love someone no matter what instead of loving them until that "feeling" goes away. Don't know about you, but I have had my share of "I love you, but I'm not in love with you and I think we should be friends" speeches in my life and I am damn tired of it.
The other day one of my friends from MD and I were discussing the ever popular feeling of "being in love". How many relationships end because they "fall out of love" or no longer are "in love". It really made me wonder if there is such a thing as "being in love" all the time? My marriage was wonderful in the beginning, like I am sure most are. Then after about 2 years the feeling of "in love" just kind of settled into the feeling of being loved and returning that love. Add a baby into that mix and life began getting hectic. After 10 years he said "I'm not in love with you anymore" um... well to be honest I wasn't "in love" with him anymore but I loved him enough to stay married and make it work. I see these couples that have been married for 40, 50 years and I know as sure as you do that there is NO WAY that they have kept the "in love feeling" all those years. I am sure they had times when they didn't like each other much at all. But they had something that most marriages don't today. They have the COMMITMENT to COMMIT to each other. Through everything that happens, be it good or bad. They made that commitment and they stayed. Of course they had their problems what couple doesn't? The difference, it's too easy to walk away from a commitment today. Commitment doesn't mean anything anymore. Words need actions to back them up. But unfortunately that doesn't happen. There are too many people out there searching for something to make them happy and give them that "high" that being "in love" gives you. Maybe it's time that we start looking for simply being loved and cherished until death do us part instead of looking for that high of emotions that crashes as soon as something goes wrong. I am not saying that there isn't such a thing as "being in love" but I do think that there is too much emphasis placed on "that" feeling. How about placing that enphasis on committing to love someone no matter what instead of loving them until that "feeling" goes away. Don't know about you, but I have had my share of "I love you, but I'm not in love with you and I think we should be friends" speeches in my life and I am damn tired of it.
posted by makinitcount @ 7:15 AM
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